November 2002
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The whole story 1: In the begining |
November 18th
Got woken at 6:05am by Jackie, cup of tea in hand saying she thought "it" was starting. Apparently she had been having pains since 4am (which I had passed off as the weak bladder that had blighted my beauty sleep over the last few weeks). Anyway she left me with my tea and went to have a bath (good NCT technique apparently). In her wisdom she sat on the toilet - with the lid down - so that when her waters broke ten minutes later they all went over the floor. At this point I did jump out of bed and start shouting "call the hospital, call the hospital, don't panic!", before heading to the bathroom to scrub the "waters" out of the carpet.
Anyway, Jackie felt suitably relaxed enough to carry on with the bath, so I went downstairs to have my breakfast (after a shave and shower of course). At this point felt sufficiently confident to text work saying I wouldn't be in - a bit of waste of time doing the work on Sunday, but hey, more important things to worry about now.
Came back upstairs to find Jackie calling the hospital. They told us she needed to go in to be given the once over, but would probably be sent home to wait after that. However we thought she ought to take her bag just in case, so between scrunches while the contractions (5mins apart) kicked in, I packed it undersupervision. We took enough food, drink and reading material to last three weeks, clean nighties and all the good things the NCT told us to. Then it was back into the bedroom to wire up the TENS machine (just as well I watched the video of what to do) and leave her playing with the settings while I went to get her some toast and more tea.
Next thing I know (7:50am) is that Jackie is putting her coat on saying she needs to go to the hospital and can't face breakfast. Another waste of effort...still, ours not to reason why.
Drove at a reasonable speed to the hospital (although round here it's hard to do otherwise) and managed to park in a good space. Put enough money in the machine to last 5hrs (wishful thinking) and headed up to the maternity ward. To start with we were put into a room with another couple. As Jackie doubled over in pain the other woman sat reading a book, which suggested she either had a higher pain threshold or wasn't quite "ready".
Anyway, it wasn't long until "the woman in labour" was transferred to the very labour room we had toured around a couple of weeks earlier. Once there Mary the midwife turned up to ask some questions, during which time Jackie had a couple of contractions. This spurred Mary on to do an "internal" instead. Off came trousers and knickers, a quick prod round and Mary pronounced Jackie to be 3-4cm dilated and not going anywhere. I wondered whether I would get to read my book soon.
The next hour passed as a bit of a blur as the contractions started to get stronger and the TENS machine got more use. Mary eventually remembered to pull the curtains so that the builders on the scaffolding outside couldn't watch, although I doubted it was prime time viewing.
Eventually Mary (or Mary Margaret as she was called, after her grandmother Margaret Mary, which presented us with some interesting naming options thinking of our parents) got the gas and air out for some additional relief. To start with Jackie claimed it wasn't working, to which Mary told her to suck harder. It was only after I went blue trying she agreed the machine wasn't actually working and went to get another. Just after she came back Jackie decided to fill one of those cardboard hats with vomit, and I got the feeling I was in for a day of bodily fluids.
10am and the contractions were really kicking in now. It was at this point that I started to worry that my car would be clamped once the ticket ran out. Thinking it was a good idea to sort it out, I dashed out to put more money in the machine. By the time I came back Jackie was 8cm dilated and progressing ahead of schedule. In true NCT style we tried the leaning on the bed rocking the hips and I got to try my back massage technique, which surprisingly was pronounced beneficial. I noticed my hand getting sore but decide this wasn't the best time to mention it.
11am - Jackie beginning to get a bit more stressed. The TENS machine is up on the high setting, the back massaging has stopped and things are beginning to sound painful.
12pm - Jackie's all fours position is pronounced to be affecting the baby (which the midwife insists on calling "he", despite us saying we think she's a she) so is rolled onto her back. Apparently her cervix hasn't quite moved out the way, so she has to hold off on the pushing (not easy I am told between pants). It's at this point she decides to suggest extra pain relief, not having any more children and wanting to go home. I tell her it's almost all over and get told off by the midwife for making such a suggestion. Instead I tell her we'll talk additional pain relief after the next four contractions. Luckily the gas and air make her lose count at two and we don't have to cross that bridge.
Mary, being part-time and out of date, calls in the senior midwife for help. Jackie's legs go up in stirrups and when she gets cramp, two trainees are drafted in to massage her calves. Ami and Caren do a stirling job to ignore the vomit, and mess that's emerging from Jackie. I throw a cup of water onto the floor in my excitement. Caren seems to see this as a job for her and spends the next few minutes wiping the floor. Not sure how Jackie's calves survive this bit.
12:30pm - summoned from my position of safety by Jackie's head saying "deep breath, deep breath" to go and see a dark head becoming visible at the lower end. Don't spend too much time there, there's all sorts of strangely coloured goo emerging and I'm not sure I like it.
1pm - the midwives start to get excited, and even from my position of safety I start to see the top of a little head. In goes a midwife's hand to sort out the umbilical cord around the neck.
1:15pm - Head still stuck and Jackie has had enough. The midwife suggests an episiotomy as the baby can't get out. Jackie is disappointed as she'd hoped to avoid this - unsurprisingly as it involves someone cutting you open, only to stitch you up again an hour later. Anyway, the midwife picks up a pair of scissors, and stands ready. At the next contraction down go the scissors, snip, and the head starts to emerge. One more push and its like seeing a calf being born as this strangely coloured, goo covered creature emerges.
1:22pm Baby born. Little girl. Loads of hair. Jackie is asked whether she wants to hold the baby, but decides she wants to have a slightly cleaner version. Seeing the position she's in, legs in the air, blood everywhere, I'm inclined to agree. My god, I'm a dad!
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